A vibrator is a great way to reach orgasm when masturbating. Just make sure to use lube, and experiment with the pressure you apply, the intensity of the vibrations, and different areas of your body to find out what feels best!

Different people turn on in different ways. Some need music or a certain smell, while others need watching pornography or reading erotica.

1. Place it on your clitoral hood

If you’re using a vibrator for the first time, or just starting to play with it, it can feel strange at first. The key is to take your time and explore. Start by softly dragging it over your most sensitive erogenous areas, like the insides of your thighs, breasts and nipples. These areas will usually respond well to vibrations and can lead to intense pleasure.

Once you’ve got a feel for the vibrator, run it up your labia and circle around your clitoris without touching it directly. Some people find that indirect clitoral stimulation is even more arousing, so don’t be afraid to try this.

If you have a partner, ask them to gently touch the outside of your labia or vulva. This is a great way to introduce the feeling of a vibrator to your vulva, and can be particularly intense when used with lubricant. Then, once you have a feel for the vibrator and your clitoral hood, ask your partner to apply it with more pressure. You can also teasingly “delay” your orgasm with a little bit of denial and teasing.

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2. Press it against your vagina/labia

You can orgasm by gently stroking your vibrator over the most sensitive parts of your erogenous zones like your neck, nipples and insides of thighs. Then you can progress to clitoral and vaginal massage by dragging the vibrator over these areas. Ensure that you have plenty of time to get aroused before you start touching yourself because, as Chase points out, “fear of orgasm can be a significant roadblock.”

It’s also worth knowing your own clitoral and vaginal preferences to choose the right vibe for you. “A vibe designed for G-spot stimulation is likely to be too intense for a lot of vulva users,” Brandon says, while a vibe for vaginal penetration may be painful or uncomfortable for many.

The key to success is to experiment. And remember that you’re not numbing or desensitizing – there’s no scientific evidence of any lasting physical damage from vibrator use. You can always change your method or bring it in to sex with a partner if you find that you need more pressure, friction and speed to orgasm.

3. Place it on your vulva/penis

For many people, the first time they use a vibrator it feels strange, but that’s okay. It’s like learning how to ride a bike or cook, there’s no right way to do it and what works for one person may not work for another. That’s why so many great vibrators have multiple modes to suit every sexual pleasure, including clitoral hood stimulation, gentle teasing and even internal ecstasy.

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If you want to go a little further, try rubbing the vibrator gently against your most sensitive erogenous zones (like your breasts, nipples and inner thighs) until you’re feeling arousal in your labia or clitoris. Then slowly run the tip up and down your vulva, circling the clitoral hood or just above it without touching the clit itself.

This is called gentle teasing and it can be very effective. It’s important to do this in order not to over-stimulate the clitoral hood, which can lead to what is known as “feathere-light touch dependency” where the clitoral hood becomes accustomed to only a certain type and intensity of stimulation. Luckily this effect is temporary and can be reversed by taking a break from using your vibrator.

4. Place it on your clitoris

The first time you use your vibrator, start by massaging your clitoris to familiarise yourself with the sensation of vibration. Using the lowest speed settings, move it around your body and enjoy the waves of pleasure.

Many women enjoy clitoral stimulation when they use their vibrator and orgasms are not uncommon. Depending on the vibrator, the intensity of the vibrations and your sensitivity, you may be able to get multiple orgasms during one session. Experiment with different vibration patterns, levels of pressure and lubrication to discover what works best for you.

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Remember that arousal and exploration are key for reaching orgasm with your vibrator. It is also important to understand that not every orgasm will be earth-shattering and this is not a bad thing.

Sex educator Elle Chase recommends factoring in enough time to get yourself aroused and into a self-pleasing headspace before you start touching yourself with your vibrator. This could be as simple as watching porn or listening to erotic music before you start. Taking the time to reach arousal allows you to experience a more intense orgasm and builds on each one for future sessions.

5. Start teasing yourself

Whether you’re new to a vibrator or a masturbation connoisseur, it takes time to figure out how to use it best. You might not orgasm on your first try, but don’t get discouraged. If you do orgasm, the next session will be even more intense.

To avoid getting too turned on, it’s helpful to start by rubbing the vibrator gently against your most sensitive erogenous zones, like the nipples and areolas, the arms, or even the inner thighs. Some people find that the lips or stomach can also feel good under the vibrations of a vibrator, so don’t be afraid to explore.

Using a sexy oil-based lube helps, but don’t be afraid to experiment with different ones. You want to make sure your lube is compatible with the toy, and that it’s not too sticky or watery. And remember that a vibrator works best with the right mindset: you’re not trying to get it to do anything but please your body. And, of course, you need a place where no one can interrupt your pleasure.