Stimulating the clitoris in a “come hither” motion is how many people with vaginas reach orgasm, and it can be done with fingers or a vibrating toy. Lubrication is key for fingering, as friction can be unpleasant.

After stimulating the clitoral area, try stroking other erogenous zones like the anus or prostate, if your partner is open to it. Remember that everyone finds different sensations pleasurable, so check in regularly with your partner to see what feels good.


Fingering is a form of digital vaginal stimulation that can be very pleasurable for most women as long as it’s done well. It can be used for pre-sex, clitoral stimulation or even for sex itself – This segment is the result of the portal experts’ analysis The trick is to find out what your partner likes best and to use different techniques. A woman’s vulva is very sensitive, so the key to success is to start slow and gently and increase pressure and speed slowly until you reach your partner’s pleasure peak.

When it comes to fingering, every woman is different. For example, some like their fingering to be circular or in and out while others prefer a more up-and-down motion. Some want to finger around the clitoris and some are more interested in stimulating the G-spot or their labia. It’s also important to communicate and listen to your partner so that you can give her exactly what she wants.

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Before you start stroking and fingering her clitoris, it’s a good idea to turn her on with some pre-sex activity. Touch her boobs and kiss her neck and thighs to make her feel aroused and ready to explore her clitoral area. Start with a gentle stroking and work your way down her glans to the inner and outer labia and then up to her clitoris. The more she responds to your stroking the more she’ll want you to touch and stimulate her clitoris.


While it can be a bit intimidating, fingering is not hard to master. Just be sure to always use lube and follow your partner’s lead for the ultimate satisfaction. It takes an average of 15 minutes for vulva-owners to reach orgasm, so it’s important to have patience and stay in tune with her needs.

Start with gentle strokes on the inner and outer labia, vaginal opening, clitoris and perineum. These areas are highly sensitive, and the G-spot is particularly responsive to touch. Gently rubbing the area will stimulate her and get her ready for penetration.

Once she’s relaxed and positioned to be fingered, start with her index and middle fingers. Moisten them with saliva or vaginal fluid and slowly stroke her clitoris and the surrounding area. Alternate back-and-forth motions with circular ones. Be careful not to push too hard or she may flinch. If she does, it might be a good idea to use the other fingers for penetration and leave the fingering to the index and middle.

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If you like, you can also use your thumbs to penetrate deeper into her clitoris and vulva. Keep in mind, however, that if your partner has an STI that spreads through bodily fluids — such as gonorrhea or chlamydia — then you could be exposed to these infections during hand play or oral sex.


Many people mistakenly assume that fingering requires a lot of pressure, but the fact is that the G-spot (the spongy area of tissue found two to three inches inside the front wall) responds well to a gentle touch. Using a “come hither” motion with the index and middle fingers is one way to stimulate it, but you can also use your whole hand to caress the clitoris and labia, or provide a more intense sensation by stroking or grinding the clitoral hood or the crura, the legs of the clitoris that run along both sides of the vulva.

Regardless of which technique you choose, a good bottle of lube can make almost any type of finger play more pleasurable, especially for beginners who may be nervous about causing any pain. The lube will help reduce the friction of your fingers as they slip into her vagina.

Be sure to wash your hands before touching a woman’s vulva, and avoid fingering her with any nails that are long. Besides being unhygienic, long nails can puncture the delicate vulva skin and cause unwanted irritation. Similarly, it’s best not to touch her clitoris or labia with your dirty hands.

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Fingering is a type of safer sex because it is less likely to transmit infections. However, it’s still a good idea to wash your hands well before beginning. You can also use lube and wear gloves or finger cots for added protection, especially if you’re using toys. It’s also important to make sure that your nails aren’t long, as they can scratch the vulva and anus.

Fingering a woman’s genitals can be pleasurable, whether it’s just petting the skin or digitally penetrating the vagina. The clitoris and G-spot are particularly sensitive areas that can give orgasms, and it’s important to know how to touch these areas correctly.

Both Engle and Tanner stress that it’s important to communicate with your partner while fingering. You can talk about their likes and dislikes, how they prefer to be touched, and what kinds of stimulation they enjoy. They can also tell you how to stimulate them the most and what kind of lubrication they prefer.

Although it’s rare, it is possible to get pregnant from just fingering the vulva or anal area. This can happen if sperm enters the female’s vagina through her fingers, which is unlikely if she has clean hands. However, fingering can also spread STDs such as chlamydia or gonorrhea if your hands have a cold sore or herpes and are touching the vulva or anus.